Hallo! My name is called Stanislas Borochinski and I am from the great and powerful nation of Russia! When was I little babushka, that's like little doll, when I was little babushka my mother she give in to my birth process - she die. And my father must have to make the taking care of me and my two older brothers, Grigor and Fyodor. We grew up in small town in eastern Russia for little while before dada could no longer make the taking care of us. He ship my brothers to German cousins to live in life of luxurious happening, I never see them again. And he send me to orphanage because I was small and frail; he did not want for me to be made the fun of in Germany since was Germans are great of physique.
At orphanage I meet many fun and exciting childrens that I make friend of, but as soon as I make friend they get sold to new mama and dada for potato sacks and rice cake. It was very lonely life for me to be orphanage all alone. I never want get close to people or make friend because I am scared they will be turned into potato. One day, when I was turning the ten year old, a strange looking dada come to orphanage for to make choice of child to turn into potato. He look over the pickings, slim at the time, we had just not many children left - many had died of the cold frost in winter and others that were left just look too sickly and ugly. This dada, after he walk around and see the stock for to make potato, he choose me! I had no believings of it! So imagine my excite when on my tenth year I get picked for to be made potato!
My new dada, he was nice man. Soon as he take me from orphanage we go to aerospace plane and he take me to new home. On plane ride I get to eat little baggie peanuts and drink tiny baby soda cans, as many as I had to want. My new dada's name was Sam, but he told me to call him Big Papa, and to throw my hands in the air if I was true playa. I knew not what this means but I was do anything for Big Papa cause he turn me to potato. We arrive at my new home in the America, I had not knowing that we was to go to the America because Big Papa not had tell me this. So we arrive on my new home in place called Hawaii, and boy I was super excite! Hawaii was green and warm, so much the different from Russia where cold is all we know.
I learn much from Big Papa in my first days on America. I found out that you not can shoot animals in street because they are someone pets, I find out what it is a McDonald hamburger, and even learn about many different picture movies that I can watch on the small box video player in the house. I love the TV! I watch many different shows but some of them confuse me. There was show I used to watch called the Different Strokes, it was definitely not what I expect it to be. I thought it would be the educational show about self-love but it was only about family and how different family member can be from each other. There was also other show, I forget name, but when Big Papa tell me about it and there was man on show he called Dynamite, I was to expecting a show about explode the cars and buildings. I was disappoint to see another show about family issues. I stop watching TV with Big Papa after that and find my own shows to watching because I did not like the family problem shows.
One day Big Papa was out to go working and I was home from school with fevers, so I turning channels on TV from my bed. I come across a show with a man in mustache who has small Chinese friend that look like a potato. The show was even take the place in my home of Hawaii! It made me excite to see. The show was the Magnum Pie. I LOVE the Magnum Pie! It was to making for me all I want in TV show - explodings and shooting and many, many boat chasings. I love the Magnum Pie so much it make me who I am being today. I grow mustache like the Tom Selleck and wear only the Hawaii shirt and ride mopedocycle all around the island.
Big Papa has long ago made the death, and I grew sadly. Now many my days I spend on beach looking at whales and hoping to see turtles give the birth to new life. I am lonely again like I was before Big Papa making me for potato but at least I will always have the Magnum Pie to keep company me when I need for him.
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